stories of a friend. read if you need to die of laughter.

Hiya! First off, I do not own
The Transformers, either G1 or the movies. Anyway, this is a short
little crack fic that I made in my spare time, which unfortunately, I
do not have enough off. I hope you enjoy it! Thanks for reading!In the Autobot base on Earth, Jazz and Bumblebee were standing around a water cooler and talking"…And that is why the new Transformers series sucks." Bumblebee told Jazz."Wow they really made you look like a loser, huh?" Jazz asked"Oh yeah.""Hey wait a minute, aren't you meant to be Gold Bug now?" Jazz asked."Uh well the thing about that is…uh…gottogo!" Bumblebee yelled running off.Jazz got himself a cup of water from the cooler and slowly took a sip "My god my life sucks.""Oh
yeah, there's no denying that. I mean you got a real bit part in that
movie they made about our Unicron adventure." Springer said, walking up
to Jazz."Yeah if only they knew what I really did during that
escapade, boy it was quite an adventure I tell ya, filled with magic
and awesomeness that would make Star Wars look boring." Jazz said,
fondly reminiscing."You gonna tell me about it then?""No. No I won't.""You suck.""Yeah well at least I didn't get tricked into making out with Starscream's ghost." Jazz countered."He had such a girly voice! I thought he was a woman!" Springer said angrily.Starscream's ghost, who had inexplicably materialised next to the water cooler began to cry and then ran off."What a freak." Springer said as he watched him run off."Attention
all Autobots report to the meeting room immediately." Optimus Prime
said over the intercom "Aw jeez I think I just leaked transmission
fluid…shit. Ratchet get in here!" Optimus continued not realising that
he still had the intercom on."Hey wait isn't Ratchet dead?" Jazz asked"Yeah
well Optimus hasn't been the same ever since he came back to life, must
have something to do with when we beat the crap out of him when he was
a zombie." Springer said"Heh, yeah you tripped him and I kept kicking him in the side repeatedly. What a day that was." Jazz said fondly.Shortly afterwards, in the meeting room..."All right Autobots…and Starscream's ghost, it seems that Galvatron is planning to steal the statue of Liberty." Optimus said."…Why?" Starscream's ghost asked"Uh…well,
because…you're a jerk and unloved!" Optimus yelled out, causing
Starscream's ghost to burst into tears again and ran out of the meeting
hall."What a freak." Sunstreaker said."As I was saying we need to stop Megatron!" Optimus said."Galvatron." Gears corrected."Galvatron." Optimus repeated"…Why?" Blaster asked."Because…because…because…Aw
screw it, lets all go to Tijuana instead! Autobots transform and
rollout!" At this the Autobots all cheered.Meanwhile, at the Decepticon base, Meg-I mean, Galvatron, was talking to his Skywar-I mean Bombsh-I mean...wait, who do I mean?"Hmm well lets go through the things-to-do checklist Cyclonus." Galvatron said to his second-in-command "First, make up plan.""Check." Cyclonus said"Second go through with plan.""Check.""Third, get beaten up by the Autobots and leave in defeat.""No." Cyclonus said."No? What do you mean no?" Galvatron yelled."Well
we didn't get the crap kicked out of us by the Autobots because they
didn't show. In fact Laserbeak says that they're all in Tijuana.""What? Tijuana? Aw man, now what am I supposed to do? I don't even want the friggin statue of liberty!" Galvatron stormed off.Cyclonus sighed "Why do I even put up with this crap? "Meanwhile in Tijuana Sunstreaker was being…himself."So I told him, just because you're fifty feet tall doesn't mean I can't beat the crap outta you."Ultra Magnus sighed "And then what?""Well then he hit me and I was sent flying…but in an awesome way!"Ultra Magnus simply sighed again.Jetfire was, by this point completely drunk."Hey Hot Rod, nobody likesh you, ya dumb wush. You shuck!""I'm Jazz you idiot!""Hey guys!" Perceptor called out "I just got a page from Spike, he says that the Decepticons are trashing a Nandoes."The Autobots just stared and Perceptor glanced at his pager again. "Oh wait, that's a Burger King."Instantly all the Autobots began rushing around, hoping to save the fast food outlet before it was too late.Well,
end of chapter 1. Hope you enjoyed it, I thought it was funny anyway,
not too funny, but chuckle worthy. Apologies for the obvious Nandoes
bashing, I just really hate that place. For those who don't get the
joke about getting Cyclonus confused with Skywarp and Bombshell, in the
original movie, Skywarp was reformatted into Cyclonus, and Bombshell
was reformatted into Cyclonus' one man "armada", but for some reason,
one of them dissapears for the rest of the film and is never seen or
mentioned again, so yeah. I know it's a little short compared to my
other Transformers fanfic, New Beast Wars, but I couldn't really
stretch it out anymore, sorry. At the moment, I'm unsure when the next
chapter's coming out, but hopefully soon. Don't forget to leave a
review, and thanks for reading.